Growing up, I was starving. Literally starving and although I could eat anything I wanted, I was dying.
My parents took me to dieticians, doctors, you name it but no matter what I ate, I could not gain weight. We all know now that I had Celiac and was, in fact really STARVING. Years later, it turned into Hashimoto’s and then Diabetes and then I gained weight. A lot of it. Never a happy medium for me, always either too thin or too big and it’s a daily struggle for me to keep myself healthy because there is gluten in about everything.
I had to change my makeup, my medicines, my hair color, my beauty products, I even had to change how I thought about living.
Going gluten free is not easy at all, and some people will just never understand that. The only restaurant I will ever go to is Chipotle, because they handle gluten free right – they even asked me if I was just gluten free or actually had Celiac then like magic all new containers of food appeared and they took great care in making my meal. No embarrassment, no fan fare just good food. I love that place.
This is James on the right and his manager on the left. He wins the Employee of the Decade award for making my meal safe and so enjoyable I almost got emotional. Thank you James.
I have a great sense of humor, ask anyone. I love to laugh and do it when happy, sad, nervous, hungry …just all the time. I love a good joke and most of the time, joking about being gluten free is pretty funny, except for when it keeps happening over and over and over in a thinly veiled attempt to feel superior. I get it, you think you’re funny but honestly, you’re a jackass. My biggest pet peeve is when someone spouts bull about “compassion” and “loving others” but then wants to just keep making fun of you and your condition. Shut up, jerkface. I am tired of hearing what comes out of your pie hole. I am offended and want you to shut up. I can take a joke, but seriously, it’s over. Move on.
This video is super funny because this is exactly what us Celiac sufferers go through, and I mean it’s dead on! Here’s an example of three things that happened to me in the last twelve months:
Situation #1: A visit with my mother
Me: Hey Mom, remember when you kept taking me to all those doctors and I still couldn’t get my weight over 96 pounds?
Mom: Yes, that was a nightmare. I don’t understand why you wanted to starve yourself.
Me: I did eat. All of the time, I didn’t want to starve.
Mom: That psychologist told me that you were a closet anorexic. I’m just glad you came to your senses.
Me: I was never an anorexic Mom, I was sick. I was really sick Mom, for real.
Mom: Well, that’s all water under the bridge. Look at all of the weight you’ve gained now, you could lose a few pounds but I’m not trying to hurt your feelings or anything. It’s just always one extreme to another with you and your weight. Find a happy middle and just stay there.
Me: Mom, you don’t understand. I found out that I was, in fact, literally starving because of an autoimmune disease. I can’t have gluten of any kind anymore.
Mom: Oh, you are on that gluten free crap now? These fad diets never work, I don’t know why you are wasting your time.
Me: Mom. I’m totally serious. I have a disease and was most likely born with it. It’s a serious thing.
Mom: Whatever. Be gluten free, but when you eat it again you are going to gain all of that weight back. Just exercise more, you could use it.
Situation #2: Dinner with the family
Me: Hey, what’s in those potatoes?
SIL: Oh just potatoes and cheese. Oh and some onions.
10 minutes later ….after eating said potatoes….
Hubby: What did you say was in the potatoes?
SIL: Cheese and stuff. It’s ok to eat.
BIL: And flour. There’s flour in that.
SIL: Oh, just about a tablespoon, it won’t hurt ya.
On that particular occasion, I looked at my husband and said “We have to go NOW! Right now!” That 20 minute drive home nearly killed me and I was so sick, because yes, a tablespoon WILL hurt me.
Situation #3: REAL cookies
I have a post coming up tomorrow for some cinnamon oatmeal cookies. They are good and I mean REALLY good. My daughter made them, took the pics and everything and we all know how proud I am of her.
We took said cookies to my mom, who loved them, and hadn’t been there half an hour when my aunt walked in and proclaimed:
“I brought your mom some cookies. Some REAL cookies…” <– insert snarky tone and eye roll here.
I guess my cookies aren’t real because they aren’t filled with wheat flour, whatevs. By the way – go sit on a tack auntie dear – but thanks for the free condescension. I hate paying the normal asking price.
There have been a lot of attempts at humor directed at us, and most are just ridiculously stupid and I just ignore and move on, but this skit is sooooo funny because it’s true! I love the way she tries to explain Celiac to these people, and the I love the characters. This is funny – like the stupid attempts to use the words “Gluten Free” like a double barrel shotgun aimed at my heart.
Take a look…
I told you it was funny.
Have a great weekend everyone!
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